I cook stew better than my wife — Ubani

A former President of the Nigerian Bar Association, Ikeja branch, Mr. Monday Ubani, discusses what fatherhood has taught him with MOTUNRAYO JOEL

What is your concept of fatherhood?

My concept of fatherhood is to be a loving father to my children and wife.  To ensure that I lead them on some basic virtues of life such as hard work, knowledge of God, fear and respect for God and elders.  I strive to demolish selfishness in the lives of my children. I also make sure that whatever they do in life, they exhibit a sense of altruism; that is, they consider others first in all they do. I want to make sure that they have integrity and honesty as their virtues. I strive to build a family with strong moral values. I also strive to meet up with my fatherly duties and ensure that my children remain united.

Can you recall your major experience as a father?

My most memorable experience was when my first son was born even though I was not prepared for some of the things I witnessed at that time. We had to wake up at night whenever he cried, other times we could not sleep until he slept. While he was growing up, one day I entered my bedroom and met some money I put there scattered all over the room.  It was a total mess. I got upset with what he did and spanked him. Surprisingly, after that incident, he grew into an adult overnight. I cannot recall his age but I know he was still crawling at the time. I was surprised at his change of attitude. He never misbehaved after that day. I am not sure if he would recollect that incident. I cannot forget it, may be because it surprised me.

What are the things you have learnt from your children?

One thing I learnt is the importance of patience. As parents, we need to be patient with our children as they grow up. At the same time, we should not spare the rod. Whenever the need arises to correct them, we should do so. By the grace of God, all my children are well-behaved.  They exhibit a high level of maturity. We should not allow our children behave in the way they choose.

How did you bond with your children?

I used to play with them whenever I returned from work. I would sing songs to put them to sleep. I realised that singing calmed them down.  I specialised in making them fall asleep.

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